If you could...(swiped from Maria)

1) live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

I really don't know, I haven't done enough travelling to be certain.  I do love Chicago, but I'm not sure I'm cut out for true city living.  I thought Santa Barbara was heaven when I visited there, but I love changing seasons so I'm not sure California is the place for me either.  Memphis and Kansas City are both fun places...but, again, the city-living thing and both of those places have some pretty gnarly crime going on.  I'm sure I could adjust to living just about anywhere, I'm more interested in a dream home rather than a dream location.

2) change anything about your body, what would it be?

My skin...I have somewhat sensitive skin and I'm constantly dealing with some minor rash or other.  I'm prone to mild psoriasis breakouts, and if the weather is either too humid or too dry I have skin reactions to both.  If I even think about poison ivy, I get it.  I'd just like to have normal skin, you know?

3) go to your perfect job, what would it be?

I always wanted to be a teacher, and I am one and for a while that was great, but now I'm growing weary of the public school system.  Teachers have had to take on so many more roles in their students' lives and, frankly, I'm NOT a nurse or a counselor or a personal chef or shopper, nor do I have any interest in being their parent. I can say that I still like my job, but I no longer love it.  If I could switch careers right now (not really a possibility at this time, maybe in 5 years or so?), I'd love to become a lactation consultant.  I feel very passionately about the benefits of breastfeeding for both babies and their mamas and I successfully nursed my two children, and worked full-time, until they were past age 1.  I think I could really help women in that capacity.

4) change anything about your partner, what would it be?

I wish Mr. EM had more patience.  He has a short fuse, can fly off the handle at minor things, and doesn't understand the fine art of ignoring some of the silly things kids do that don't really require discipline but are very annoying.  Overall, he is a wonderful partner and a good daddy...but, it would really be nice to not be a referee between him and the kids sometimes.

5) have dinner with a celebrity, who would you choose?

Oh my...I really don't know.  I have so many ridiculously immature celebrity crushes, but I can't really imagine sitting down to dinner with Brad Pitt or George Clooney!  I really, really, really admire Meryl Streep as an actress, so maybe I could have dinner with her and just let her talk about all of her acting experiences. 

6) be invisible for a week, what would you do?

I'd love to visit my boys' classrooms and see first-hand the environment they're in 5 days a week.  And, like Maria, I would have a little fun messing with people I'm not fond of...like totally rearranging Macho Man's basement room that he's so stupidly protective of or put liberal bumper stickers on my cousin's asshat husband's car.

7) tell someone the absolute truth what would you say?

I would tell my parents that I was really disappointed at the way they treated Mr. EM when we were first dating and that I'd never felt more alone than when they told me that they wouldn't support me if I decided to marry him.  I've forgiven them, but that chapter of my relationship with them is always hanging there in the back my head.  I would also call out the Ex on the way she trapped Mr. EM to marry her by lying about being pregnant.

8) have a talent that you don't have now, what would it be?

I really wish I could sing.  I'd love nothing more than to be the singer of a really cool rock band.

9) see someone who has died just for an hour, just to talk, who would you want to see?

Only my paternal grandmother lived long enough to know my boys.  I'd like my other grandparents to spend that hour with them.

10) be the opposite sex, who would you want to look like?

Brad Pitt

11) take one thing back that you've said to someone, what would it be?

Wow, that's a tough one.  I've stuck my foot in my mouth more than my fair share of times and I've hurt people with my words more than I care to admit.  I've become much more sensitive over the years, but if I could take it all back, I would.  Can't pick just one.

12) pick the time of your death, when would you want it to be?

Like Maria, I'd like to go before I become a burden to either my husband or kids.  I'd like to be surrounded by them when I go, telling them I how much I loved them and how great they made my life just before I close my eyes for the last time.

13) pick an actress to play you in the movie of your life, who is closest to what you really look like and could play your personality well?

I honestly can't think of a single actress that I resemble in any way.  In college I was sometimes told that I looked like Laurie Metcalf, the woman who played Jackie on Roseanne.  I didn't see it, but usually when someone said that, others would agree.  I like her and have always enjoyed the characters she's played, so she works for me...though she's a bit older than I am.  I don't know...can't I just pick Kate Winslet?  I love her.

14) change your name to any other, what would it be?

Irene...it means "peace" in Greek.